Priority order for deciding partner

Marriage is most important phase of our life. To whom we rely in this age of marriage apps for guidance? May be this community can help...
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Snehil
Posts: 2
Joined: Sat Aug 11, 2018 2:54 pm

Priority order for deciding partner

Post by Snehil » Sat Aug 11, 2018 3:56 pm

Hello everybody...

There are so many things to keep in mind while deciding your partner. You have to see personality, age, income :lol: :lol: , family, kundali :roll: :roll: , vegetarian, height, hobbies, etc. A friend of mine suggested to choose just three things and then search. But I think it is better to get late than choosing a wrong partner. How do you people decide on these things? Which ones you put in priority list??

seema
Posts: 4
Joined: Sat Aug 11, 2018 2:55 pm

Re: Priority order for deciding partner

Post by seema » Sat Aug 11, 2018 4:32 pm

I am answering in the order of prioritising the qualities from top priority at no. 1.

1) Nature of the person is the top priority. The guy should have similar opinions or thought process to u at least in some cases if not in most. He should respect you, your opinions and your people(friends, family etc) He should be able to at least understand your perspective if not agree with it.

2) His priorities. How important are his family,job, friends, relations to him and in what order. A person who loves his family but is also capable of reprimanding their incorrect behaviour will make a good loving and caring husband who will always give u constructive criticism.

3) His career goals should match with yours. If you want you both to settle abroad but he wants to stay with family or you want to stay in your current city for your job an he wants to move that could cause a conflict of interest.

4) You should have at least some common hobbies even if it is just sleeping late on Sundays. If all your hobbies are different then either one of you will be forced to do they don't like ( this could even be a positive thing as you will get to try something new) to spend time together or will each spend most of the time apart doing your own thing.

5) Financial means. Although it is preferred that the combined income of the husband and wife should be enough to sustain their lifestyle, if either partner is a home maker, the other should have enough means to maintain the lifestyle of both partners. Yet considering the bank statement or income statement comes as the fifth priority only as more money can be earned later but the innate nature of a person cannot be changed.

6) Health. Although minor to medium ailments should be ignored, a medical examination of both parties before marriage is essential to know about any major problems like hiv or other stds which may effect you or your life later.

7) Looks. In my opinion, they don't matter at all but some people prefer their partners to be varying degrees of presentable.

8) His family. At the end of the day, its you two that matter. Ignore everyone else. Take the good bad and the ugly with a pinch of salt and stick together through highs and lows.

Teja
Posts: 3
Joined: Sat Aug 11, 2018 2:51 pm

Re: Priority order for deciding partner

Post by Teja » Wed Aug 15, 2018 3:04 pm

For me, education and compatibility are the only two criteria. So I do not have any priority list

anurag
Posts: 4
Joined: Sat Aug 11, 2018 2:52 pm

Re: Priority order for deciding partner

Post by anurag » Wed Aug 15, 2018 4:41 pm

I do not think one should have any priority order list. Just evaluation each person on his or her own merit. I met a girl who was very intelligent but was not willing to move outside Delhi/NCR. I also met a girl who wanted to get settled outside marriage.

I guess no matter how much you try your destiny is predecided. So better chill.... :lol: :lol:

shobha
Posts: 4
Joined: Sat Aug 11, 2018 2:58 pm

Re: Priority order for deciding partner

Post by shobha » Wed Aug 15, 2018 4:56 pm

There are so many factors involved that even I got confused. The matrimonial sites ask you so many things.

My sister helped me out on this. I wrote down all the factors and then kept striking off the ones I think do not matter. Like vegetarian or non vegetarian, skin color, height etc are not important for me.

Then I thought how do I actually see the profiles. Normally I first see the education and then hobbies. So I thought these are priorities for me. In this way I jotted down 4-5 factors. This one time process has made groom hunting easy for me. Sorry my groom for using that word :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

nalin
Posts: 7
Joined: Sat Aug 11, 2018 2:35 pm

Re: Priority order for deciding partner

Post by nalin » Thu Aug 16, 2018 8:38 am

My priority order is different than most of you. It is looks and looks... :) :) ....And if the gal talks a lot like the girls normally do, I will give all points.... :lol: :lol: :lol:

Just my take on this

arpit
Posts: 9
Joined: Sat Aug 11, 2018 2:50 pm

Re: Priority order for deciding partner

Post by arpit » Thu Aug 16, 2018 9:06 am

seema wrote:
Sat Aug 11, 2018 4:32 pm
I am answering in the order of prioritising the qualities from top priority at no. 1.

1) Nature of the person is the top priority. The guy should have similar opinions or thought process to u at least in some cases if not in most. He should respect you, your opinions and your people(friends, family etc) He should be able to at least understand your perspective if not agree with it.

2) His priorities. How important are his family,job, friends, relations to him and in what order. A person who loves his family but is also capable of reprimanding their incorrect behaviour will make a good loving and caring husband who will always give u constructive criticism.

3) His career goals should match with yours. If you want you both to settle abroad but he wants to stay with family or you want to stay in your current city for your job an he wants to move that could cause a conflict of interest.

4) You should have at least some common hobbies even if it is just sleeping late on Sundays. If all your hobbies are different then either one of you will be forced to do they don't like ( this could even be a positive thing as you will get to try something new) to spend time together or will each spend most of the time apart doing your own thing.

5) Financial means. Although it is preferred that the combined income of the husband and wife should be enough to sustain their lifestyle, if either partner is a home maker, the other should have enough means to maintain the lifestyle of both partners. Yet considering the bank statement or income statement comes as the fifth priority only as more money can be earned later but the innate nature of a person cannot be changed.

6) Health. Although minor to medium ailments should be ignored, a medical examination of both parties before marriage is essential to know about any major problems like hiv or other stds which may effect you or your life later.

7) Looks. In my opinion, they don't matter at all but some people prefer their partners to be varying degrees of presentable.

8) His family. At the end of the day, its you two that matter. Ignore everyone else. Take the good bad and the ugly with a pinch of salt and stick together through highs and lows.
That was some detail, Seema...I will prefer to not have any priority order and just see if I am comfortable with the person. That is how we make friends also na....don't know how others will react but that is how it will be for me. :) :)

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